


Woensdag 21:53

by Skammmm



Category: WTFock | Skam (Belgium)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Internalized Homophobia, Light Angst, Missing Scene, POV Robbe IJzermans, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-25
Updated: 2020-08-25
Packaged: 2021-03-06 16:27:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,227
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26111869
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Skammmm/pseuds/Skammmm
Summary: Set after Woensdag 21:53What could have happened if Sander followed Robbe after his outburst at the boy squad.This is my first ever fic, hopefully you like it.
Relationships: Sander Driesen/Robbe IJzermans
Comments: 2
Kudos: 46





	Woensdag 21:53

Set after Woensdag 21:53  
Robbe’s chest heaved he looked down at his shaking hands and ungraciously ran them through his messy hair, he’d just told Noor that he was fine and to go back outside with the others and was now finally alone. His anger was dissipating now he could almost feel it seeping out of his body and gradually being replaced by hurt and embarrassment. Why couldn’t he have just held it together for a few more days and just ignored the feeling of panic and shame that filled him every time he looked at Noor or Sander? Why couldn’t he have just played along with the boys prank and they seemingly constant inability to see that he was struggling, he’d been doing it for months and it had been working just fine, Robbe: the straight, easy going guy in the group who just went along with what the others wanted to do and laughed along with all the jokes? Now, there were going to be questions and concerned glances from Noor and all the rest of them, it would be easy to just blame it all on his parents and it wouldn’t be a lie, he did lay in bed at night worrying about his mum and her future, imagining the worse possible scenarios and often when he had finally fallen asleep he was only able to get a few hours before stress dreams or nightmares woke him up, but that wasn’t what was going on tonight. 

Tonight it was Sander, he couldn’t get him out of his head and it made him feel sick, he’d worked so hard to get over his stupid crush on Jens and concentrate on flying under the radar. He’d get with enough girls at parties to maintain his straight status, laugh along with Moyo’s homophobic jokes so that none of the boys suspected anything but God he never meant to get a girlfriend, that just happened, and he certainly never meant to become utterly consumed by thoughts of his girlfriends best friends boyfriend, his plan was falling apart and all he could feel was guilt and shame. 

That’s all he could think about as he sat on the lower bunk of the bed in the boys vaguely smelly room; the shame. It was so immense, but when he’d been with Sander it had dimmed and he’d felt genuinely happy and good about himself because it felt like someone was actually seeing him, but as soon as he was left alone with his thoughts, or as soon as he saw Noor and she kissed him and suggested they go further the shame came back in full pelt winding him, knocking out any of the good that he might have felt in Sander’s presence. He could hear the others still talking and laughing outside, he wasn’t surprised it wasn’t like he was an integral part of the group: Jens, Moyo and Aaron seemed to be having more fun without him lately and he knew it was only a matter of time until Jens and the other two grow tired of his shit and leave, he just needed to get back to his old, normal self before that happened. 

‘Hey’

Robbe’s head swung up, he’d closed the door, how had he not heard it open?

‘umm, Noor said that you’d ask to be left alone but I thought that maybe, well look I don’t know anyone here you know apart from Britt so like if you wanted to vent or shout or whatever about your friends then I’d probably be the perfect person, unbiased and impartial and all that shit’, Robbe was still staring at him too surprised to say anything. He noticed that Sander seemed nervous as he spoke chuckling at the end, seemingly more out of awkwardness and apprehension than anything else. It was weird he’d only ever seen Sander exhibiting nothing but confidence from the very first time he’d met him, it made him feel a type of warmth he’d never felt before. 

‘I just really fucking embarrassed myself, didn’t I?’, he replied bitterly. 

‘Nope, I don’t think so, and to be honest from what I’ve seen of your friends so far they do they fair share of embarrassing stuff. And also I think that maybe they deserved it.’ Just like that Sander had returned to his confident self, smiling his kind yet mischievous smile. 

‘Oh, impartial huh?’, Robbe chuckled. Sander laughed and shrugged as he moved to sit on the other end of the bed from him. Having Sander so close to him made him nervous and he could suddenly feel every inch of his body as he felt Sander sink into the bed. 

‘Maybe you’re just my favourite’, he said with a wink. ‘Are you okay’, he then said softly when Robbe didn’t reply. 

‘yeah, I’m fine. I’m just tired.’ Robbe said not even bothering to hide the obvious sadness in his voice. 

‘yeah, I get that I mean there’s not exactly any privacy here and everyone’s with everyone all the time, pretty intense. But only 2 more nights then you’ll have some space, be home.’ Sander spoke with obvious compassion, Robbe wanted to cry, he was trying so hard and he barely knew him.

‘No privacy, has been my life recently’, he said with a smile. 

‘Why?’, Sander chuckled meeting his eyes. 

‘I live in an apartment with Zoe, her boyfriend Senne and another guy, Milan, who let’s just say is not exactly the biggest respecter of boundaries.’

‘Yeah, that’s a lot’, he hesitated before continuing.

‘um before, outside, you mentioned that you had shit going on with your parents, is that because of- is that why you live in the apartment.’

‘yeah, it’s not permanent or anything just necessary at the moment’, Robbe spoke the last bit quietly anxious to get it out before the lump rising in his throat escaped. Thankfully Sander seemed to sense his reluctance to dwell on his living situation despite the fact that he was the one who brought it up, which had surprised him as he usually shied away from it but they was something comfortable and familiar about Sander that made him want to be honest. 

‘Everyone’s drunk a lot, they probably won’t even remember that and if they do I doubt they’ll bother you about it tomorrow’, he said giving Robbe a friendly pat on the shoulder, yet when Robbe looked up to meet his eyes they was something decisively not friendly about, it was like he could see all of Robbe and it was so incredibly unnerving, he’d felt so ignored for months but here was this boy, this beautiful boy who apparently after a mere few days understood him in a way he wasn’t sure any one else did.  
Sander chuckled as he watched Robbe stare at him, making no effort to speak. Robbe quickly glanced down and softly chuckled. 

‘Jesus Sander, you coming’, Britt shouted from behind the door, causing both boys to jump and Sander to let out a small, but very obvious groan. 

‘umm, well I guess I should go’, Sander whispered. 

‘yeah, yeah of course, thanks for-‘, Robbe’s hesitation caused another smile to break out across Sander’s face. 

‘you’re welcome Robin’, he said with a mischievous grin as he backed out of the door, eyes not leaving Robbe’s. 

‘Goodnight Sander’.


End file.
